Version 2.9

I've noticed this trend.

When you're old...and it's your birthday...you just laugh and say you're 29.

Have you noticed this too?

Have you ever asked....why 29?

Is it because 30 is officially old?

Or because it's your last hurrah in the 20's, which is supposedly the glory years of freedom and discovering oneself?

In 4 days, I will be 29.

I am very intrigued to find out how glorious my life becomes for the next 365 days....starting Tuesday.

I do fully expect that suddenly my bank accounts will be bursting at the seams.

I do sense that my lady lumps will magically perk up as they simultaneously grow anther cup size.

If 29 is nothing short of fabulous, then of course, I fully expect to have Sven serving me martinis at 11, Pablo ready at a whim to massage my every ache, and Stephan (pronounced Stef-ON) ridding my pool of each and every buggy intruder.

And since my eggs will be rotten the day I turn 30, I better make one more perfect spawn this year to complete the zen like serenity in my home.

I also have a very strong sense that since everyone apparently wants to stay 29 forever, there must be some sort of personal super-power one receives upon the bless-ed day. And if I get to pick, I am choosing the pause-o-matic life remote...kinda like Adam Sandler's Click movie.

Whining child...click....silence.

Husband talking about film crews forEVER....click....stillness.

Best kiss you've ever had...click...holding on to that enjoyment. ;)

Thousands of fans screaming your name as your music echos in a packed out stadium...click...stare into Bono's eyes as he reaches out to you from the front row just to have you touch his hand....hey....my clicker....my super power!

So, I will surely take extra stock in the lessons of being a poor desperate housewife for these next 4 days.

For after that...I upgrade to version 2.9...

TWENTY NINE!! Let the lustrious, Bono-fied, immortality begin!