The days that you suspect are part of your life if ONLY for teaching you patience.
I've had a lot of those all sandwiched on top of each other for weeks now. But just recently, may I possibly *whisper* this without the cosmos hearing me and crashing in on the party...I think it's getting better. Like a LOT better. The routines that we began in September are now getting done like we're on auto-pilot. And Momma is feeling at home again in this new chapter of life. *Big sigh*
So. I just wanted to write down a few things, if not for you, than at least for me to look back on, if for some unbeknownst reason to me, the crazy days pop up again, which I am SURE they won't, then I can try to see the silver lining if I squint hard enough.
- When you have spent an entire week wearing sweats, the *ahem*same sweats, at least your booty still fits in them after consuming untold amounts of Oreo Cakesters while sobbing over Grey's Anatomy.
- If You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls...and HE hangs up on YOU...well, at least you still have a phone, and you can always call Skyla, she'll put you on speakerphone and "uh huh" mindlessly for hours.
- If popsicles have become a staple food group, remember the sound of silence that follows is priceless. And chocolate milk ones count for one dairy serving, it's the law.
- When your feet are sticking to the kitchen floor, crank up that old Snoop Dog song and work the sticky sound in with your killer dance moves.
- If you are singing along to the Elmo song that's in your car's CD player long after you have dropped the kids off, well, there's no silver lining on that one. Please get help. Immediately.
- If your purse contains packages of Pepperage farm goldfish, a juice box, assorted wrappers and and two soothers, at least you can zip that thing shut and everyone will just think it's a lovely bag... oh, except for the fact that your 3 year old has written her huge name backwards in permanent marker on the side that you are unaware of... yeah... except that.
- If Tylenol PM has become part of your daily vitamin intake, remember this is just the "light" stuff. People take much more heavier things to sleep. You are practically an organic druggie next to them. *Pat pat* way to go.
- If you need a dress for an occasion and realize the night before that you don't have one and if you do, you don't have shoes other than Keds with grass stains on them, mmmm, don't forget how HOT you look in those sweats. Grab the Cakesters, throw out the scale, pop on a Grey's DVD, and forget the party. We all know chocolate and McDreamy are the only friends who are consistently faithful anyways.
- And finally, when the baby eats 3/4 of the dog food, remind yourself, it's vitamin and mineral enriched, it's probably great for him too.
4 comments:
So glad u r back and u didn't disappoint!! I was laughing my tail off {not that I literally have a tail--just sayin'}
btw--Oreo cakesters---NOM, NOM, NOM!!
At least I am good for something!
xoxox
What am I?
I miss you like crazy!
miranda
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