Disclaimer:
My baby has been sick for 4 weeks now. He does not sleep. In turn, I do not sleep. When one does not sleep for days to weeks at a time, she ends up doing things and saying things that may not make any sense...to anyone else at least...although she may think she makes perfect sense, and all the world around her has jumped off the deep end. It's like living in a parallel universe...a zombie universe. And once you have been there, your face becomes your passport, and gets stamped with the evidence of the trip. It's easy to see, when you are a mommy, the others who have gone before you to this comatose world, and those who are with you. Right. Now. So, welcome, fellow journeywomen, to the unbalanced NMM confessions of a very sleep deprived Mommy.
- I did not try to pay for my groceries with my library card. It was rejected.
- I was not completely confused when 10 seconds after changing baby L's diaper, his pants were soaking wet. Only to realize that I did not actually put a "lil swimmer" diaper on him by mistake.
- I did not fall asleep in the church nursery while nursing the baby and nearly miss my solo.
- After said solo, I did not go back to the nursery and realize that the right cup of my bra was still folded under my boob...and had been during the entire time I was on stage. I was not thanking God that I was wearing a tight tank top under my sweater that *hopefully* concealed this tidbit of information.
- I did not commit the unpardonable woman sin and ask the lady at swimming lessons when she's due. She's not pregnant. Crawling in hole now.
- Finally, I did not decide to take a nice relaxing break from crazytown and have a bath...too bad I thought the toilet cleaner was the bubble bath. It did make bubbles. They were blue. And didn't smell too stawberry-ish. Took me a second to figure out maybe I shouldn't step into the tub.
7 comments:
Aww hand the baby off to Daddy and go crawl in bed!
Had to chuckle a little at your post though I totally know how you feel. =)
You poor mama! Try and enjoy the sleepless nights rocking your babe.
Miranda
Haha! I love it!
*Jacalyn
I did NOT just use my vacuum cleaner to clean my kitchen counters.
Nope.
The store won't accept my AAA card as payment either! And after I had Nayden it took me all most a hole day to realize that my left bra strap had been cut and my boobage was hanging out! you are so not alone!
Dang Gina!!! I'm so sorry! JP
I did not try to use a gift card as a debit card the other day while purchasing the little one some clothes!!!
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